Forgotten Memory

Memories of you are meant to be treasured
I fill my mind with it every night
But it still haunts me the moment I left
With you knowing and have no choice but to accept
 
Years have passed, memories are slowly fading
Yet, my heart can’t forget what the mind has forgotten
I slowly rejoice when the present gave a glimpse of the past
Where memories are slowly being introduced again
 
This recollection made a realization
On the smile created by the euphoric images
Up to the scar of the past which made me question
“Why is it hard to forget the past?”
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Overwhelmed

I just wanted to be home-schooled again because everything feels so overwhelming. Also, the people surrounding me whom I cared so much seems to not care at all.

The world seemed to be fast
My heart was left behind
I just wanna release everything
The things kept in my heart.

How I wish expressing was easy
How I wish words could easily be formed
The only things I can do was to let my tears fall

For every tear means every pain
For every tear means loneliness
For every tear means sadness
For every tear means enlightening my weary soul

Oh! I just wish I can turn back time
The moment where I kept myself in isolation
Where my heart is not yet corrupted
By the norms of the world

Mentors In Life

Mentors in life are supposed to be respected and obeyed. They teach us to have a purified soul, removing all corruptions in our hearts. They filter all the impurities that will cause an obstruction in the flow of love and compassion that may be given to others. The lessons given by them are not to be disregarded, but to instill it in our hearts.

Outcast

Peers made me feel left out. It’s like they made me feel like I’m the most boring person on Earth. As I sit on the corner beside the wall, there is a vacant seat behind and beside me. It’s like they don’t want to sit near me. Is there something wrong with me? Then tell me! All I see is everyone in their group. I must be a really boring person to be with.

Isolation leads to loneliness

Where connection is mostly desired

By the people outside the circle

Bounded by common insights

Hunger for relationship; thirst for belongingness

Looking for meaning conversation

Where my soul would be enriched

Lost in the mist of emptiness

Finding someone to be with

To break the norms of the world

To set journey outside the comfort

To break what is beyond our limitations

Having this treasure is a desire

Treasures that know the loneliness

Treasures that know the emptiness

To know the steps of happiness

Even when deep silence arrives

Vague

There are things I just can’t accept and I keep on denying. I’ve been blinded by my own lies, and acceptance is needed to see the truth.

From the start, I hope to see hidden expectations

Expectations that are meant to belittle myself

Then everything started, I hope to survive

A little more motivation, another chapter will end

Emotions are overwhelming at the reality of life

Acceptance is a must if you’ll want to survive

This ain’t the past, I can’t accept it

This thoughts kept repeating not knowing why

Many questions I have to answer

Train of thoughts never seem to end

Inner struggle hinders my desires

Desires that are mysterious to others

Trying to deny things, suppressing them from coming

Inner conflict is a challenge

In the end, acceptance is a must

Acceptance is the key for my own denial

Chess

When you know the truth but they keep telling lies. Just play innocent to avoid being caught in the middle of the conflict.

Now, let’s play a game of chess

I’ll move my pon

I’ll be waiting for your turn

Think before you touch

For there is no undo

Now, please take your time

Plan your move carefully

Don’t fall for my trap

You have to see things through

Staring at the wall, smiling

But there is more behind the smile

Smiles that turn to smirk

So be careful with your lies

Taken For Granted

I feel like I’m being taken for granted- talking to me only when they need something. It’s really painful knowing that I got attached to them since I wanted to have friends. Now, I just wanted to be alone and to be unkind to others.

A long road far ahead

It never seem to end

Always walking wearily

And asking where will it end

There were many people passing by

So many people you will encounter

So many people you’ll never decipher

Some may push you down

Some may pull you up

They’re good; they’re bad

And some just simply don’t care

It does not seem to be fair

How many people have I cared enough?

How many people have I been kind to?

To think that they are taking me for granted

And my soul is becoming shattered

My mind cannot comprehend

It’s been almost a year

And nothing seems to happen

Tight atmosphere that I can feel

Awkwardness has enveloped

Silence! Silence! is always there

You all seem to be different than the others

Different that I don’t understand

You seem to be nice when I saw you

Yet time has passed and I saw it

You never really cared

You’re just taking me for granted

You’re not the kind that I deserve

Because when the time comes

I don’t want to be hurt

The moment you didn’t need me

Felt like a sharp dagger stabbed in me

I valued you, but you left me in thin air

You started ignoring me like I was nothing

Every moment I wondered

What was wrong with me?

The truth spoke that pained me

Scars have been done in my heart

To know that I’ve been taken for granted

Humihilom na Sugat (Spoken Word)

Don’t read if you have not read Masakit na Alaala. This is the part 2 of it.

Ayaw ko na

Palagi ka na lang umiiyak

Gusto ko na kadapatak ng luha mo ay ako ang sasalo

Gusto ko na ako ang magpupunas at papangitiin ka

Tama na

Nasasaktan ako kapag nasasaktan ka, para bang iisang tao lang tayo

Alam ko na walang pang ‘tayo’ pero ang sakitS

a tuwing umiiyak ka sa balikat ko, napupunta ang sakit sa akin

Sobrang sakit na

Simula ng malaman ko na hindi ako

Na kaibigan lang talaga ang tingin mo sa akin

Pero tutulungan pa rin naman kita sa pag hilom ng sugat

 

Huwag ka mag-alala nasa tabi mo lang ako lagi

Handa ako pangitiin ka at patawanin ka para makalimutan mo ang sakit

Habang unti-unti mong nakakalimutan ang sakit ay nagkaroon ng tayo

Yung tayo na palagi kang nakangiti

Yung tayo na nakalimutan mo na ang sakit

Yung tayo na pang habang buhay

Alam ko corny ako mag-bigay ng jokes at pick-up lines

Pero kahit papaano naman tumatawa ka

Alam ko din na torpe ako kaya nga naunahan ako

Hindi tuloy ako yung first love mo

Pero salamat dahil binigyan mo ko ng chance kaya hindi ko ito sasayangin

Kahit mayroon ng tayo hindi magbabago ang samahan natin

Puprotektahan pa rin kita, tutulungan pa rin kita, at papasayahin pa rin kita.

 

Creative Writing 1

  1. I made 4 Haikus from my class. Every title is according to the portrait that I was shown.
  • The Soldier

As the soldier stood

With the greatest bravery,

The horse stood by him.

  • The Countryside

The animal grazes

In the barn of the farmer

Who lies in the grass

  • Landscape of the Four Season

Seasons collided 

And the world has been ruined

But it has passed by

  • Peaceful Land

As I watch with joy, 

The world seems to be silent.

The world came to peace.

I know that you are laughing right now. Don’t worry I ain’t angry. I find it funny too.

2. This composition is suppose to be a Shakesperean Sonnet, but my teacher commented that it should be like a love letter to someone.

Forgive me for the title. I didn’t think about it.

  • Two-way Love

Love is an unseen force

That can ease up the heart of a vain.

It can be seen in a different course

That can either give a heart full of pain

 

It gives pain when they are away

When you are alone, you long for it.

It gives you an emotion that is gray,

And this is the nightmare that I dreamt.

 

My heart craves for it 

When they are in a distant land.

Loneliness started to fill

And this feeling seems so grand

 

To you my love will never fade

But it will be sharp as a blade.

 

It sounds like a broken-hearted poem. I know right.

3. Limerick is hard since I have little humor

  • Tree

I tried to climb on a tree in a bay

My brother is on the grass; he lay

While I climbed, it rained.

Fear swallowed my brain

Just to see I was just inches away

I have no idea if it has humor. 

4. This is a villanelle concerning about a social issue. I remembered the war happening in Marawi City.

  • Finding peace

When will peace come?

There are bodies on the ground.

Our heart is now filled with glum.

 

Noises are louder than the drum.

Families have not yet been found.

When will peace come?

 

Houses turned to crumb. 

Tears has flowed and fear has drowned.

Our heart is now filled with glum.

 

Every people has been dumb

By the disturbances around.

When will peace come?

 

Their life is now a glum

Happenings hurt and wound

Our hearts is now filled with glum.

 

Killer’s heart has numb

And they tried to impound

When will peace come?

Our hearts is now filled with glum.

I hope and pray for peace. So, you should too

 

Masakit na Alaala (Spoken Word)

This is a fictional spoken word. Many of you can relate to it, but I can’t because I haven’t been into any relationships. I got inspired by Juan Miguel Severo. This man is just amazing. His poems are amazing because all of the pain had penetrated in my heart after listening for at least 30 minutes on Youtube. The pain felt so real, thus creating this poem.

Isang araw napa-isip ako kung bakit mo ako iniwan

Iniwan mo ako sa ere

Iniwan mo akong mag-isa

Sa totoo lang magulo pa rin sa akin isipan

Dahil hindi ko alam kung bakit kailangan gawin mo ito sa akin

Napatanong na lang ako kung bakit nangyayari ito sa akin

Kung bakit pa kailangan na humantong sa ganto

Nang naliwanagan ako sa lahat

Doon ko na lang napagtanto na may mahal ka ng iba

Ang katagang ‘tapos na tayo’ ang sumaksak sa aking dibdib

Sa bawat luhang pumapatak ay sumisimbolo sa sugat na binigay mo sa aking puso

Sa bawat araw na lumilipas nadudurog ako

At habang tumatagal ay pabawas ng pabawas ang sakit

Ngunit sa tuwing nakikita kita bumabalik ang alaala ng pagdurusa

Kung paano mo ako sinaktan sa likod ko ng hindi ko namamalayan

Kung paano mo tinalikuran ang pangako mo na mamamahalin mo ako habang buhay

Ang galing mo kasi

Ang galing mong mag pa-ikot ng mga linya na bibitawan mo para lang tamaan ako at mahalin ka.

Naalala ko pa nung unang ligaw mo sa akin

Ang sabi mo handa kang magtiis para lang sa akin

Lahat ng sakit ay tatanggapin mo upang mapa sa iyo lamang ako

Bakit tila bumaligtad ang mundo at ako ang nagtitiis ng sakit ngayon?

Sakit na ipinagpalit mo ako

Sakit na iniwan mo

Sakit dahil hindi mo pinanindigan ang pangako mo na napako lang sa hangin.

Nagsisisi ako nakilala para hindi na lang sana ako nasaktan

Nagsisisi ako minahal kita para hindi na sana ako umiyak

Nagsisisi ako na sinagot kita at binuhos ko lahat ng pagmamahal ko sa iyo

Kahit papaano naman sana ay may iniwan ako sa aking sarili para hindi msyadong masakit

Nagsisisi ako sa bawat araw na pinaramdam mo na mahal mo ako pero hindi naman pala

Na sa bawat araw na magkasama tayo, hindi totoo ang ang binibitawan mong salita na ‘mahal mo ko.’

Minahal kita ng lubos at handa ako ibigay ang buhay ko para lang sayo kaso lang ikaw ang unang bumitaw

Hindi ko man alam ang dahilan kung bakit mo ko ipinagpalit ngunit ikaw pa rin ang aking unang minahal

Alam ko na hindi na dapat ipaalala pero ito ang katotohanan

Na ikaw ang unang taong bumilanggo sa aking puso

Alam ko din na masaya ka na sa kanya

Kaya ako na ang nagparaya at hindi na kita muling hinabol

Kung tutuusin, ang sarap balikan ng nakaraan

Yung nakaraan kung saan ako unang umibig

Yun nakaraan na paulitulit ako umiyak

Yung nakaraan kung saan ko naranasan masaktan

Inaamin ko na may kaunting kirot parin

Ngunit dumaan ang maraming taon at humihilom na ang sugat

Na ang kapalit ng sakit na ibinigay mo sakin ay isang magandang ngiti, isang tawa na parang walang bukas, at punong-puno ng pagmamahal

Na habang humihilom ang sugat ay nakilala ko ang aking pinakamamahal.

Painful Memories

(English Version)

One day I asked, “Why did you leave me?”
leaving me in the air. Leaving me alone.
Then, I asked, “Why is this happening to me?
Why does it have to end like this?”
When everything became clear, I realized that you loved someone else.

Ending our relationship stabbed me in the heart.
Every falling tear symbolizes the wound that you gave.
Every passing day, I feel broken.
I adjusted to it, but every time I see you, the memories of pain came back.
The pain of betrayal.
The pain of a broken promise that you will love me until the end.
You’re good at manipulating the words you say just to make me fall in love with you.

I remember the first day you courted me.
You said you are ready to face pain just for me.
You said you are willing to accept pain so that I could be yours. Why, then, did the world turn upside-down and I was the one suffering the pain?
The pain of replacing me.
The pain of leaving me.
The pain of a promise that flew with the air.

I regret meeting you; I wish that I didn’t so that I’m not in pain. I regret loving you; I wish I didn’t so that I didn’t have to cry.
I regret the moment I said yes and I poured my love to you; I wish I have left a little to myself so that the pain is not that great.
I regret the days we spent together that you made me feel special, but it is just an act.
And the words “I love you” is not really meant for me.

I loved you so much to the point of sacrificing my life for you, but you were the first to let go.
I may not know the reason why you replaced me, but you were my first.
I know that I shouldn’t remind it, but the truth that you were the first person that captivated my heart is irreplaceable.
I also know that you are happy with her;
I set you free, and I let it be.

I am happy to be reminded of my past.
The past where I first experienced love.
The past where I cried.
The past where I encountered my first heartache.
I do admit that there is still a lit bit of pain, but years have passed and the wound has been healed.
Someone gave me sweet smiles, crazy laughs, and true love. And I met him while the wound is healing